A ROUGH GUIDE TO SNOWBOARDING

“You are goofy.” Or so says the employee in the snowboarding shop who speaks a mountain dialect you only partially understand. Fortunately, you’ve played plenty of video games and understand what goofy means: to stand on a snowboard with your right foot in front, obviously. It’s your first time on the white stuff and your encounter with the shop assistant has taught you two things: firstly, facial hair is popular in the Alps and secondly, you’re going to need a dictionary to understand the beard-muffled lingo of the mountains. So here are ten key phrases to guide you from A to steazy:
Bail: Deciding at the last moment not to commit to a trick, which often results in a bruised ego and/or a bruised behind.
Bluebird: A beautiful, cloudless day that encourages the drinking of vin chaud at lunchtime and makes skiers and snowboarders alike feel ‘stoked’.
Butter: A dairy-based condiment spread on croissants, or a type of snowboard trick performed on the ground.
Jibs: Natural and man-made features found on the side of pistes that you can incorporate into tricks.
Shredding pow: If you are ‘shredding pow’ you are carving through fresh snow like a hot knife through butter.
Steazy: A combination of the words stylish and easy. If someone says you are ‘steazy’ then you are doing it right.
Sticks and Trays: Nothing says you know what you are talking about more than using these words instead of skis and snowboards.
Stoked: A term adopted from shaggy-haired surfers meaning you feel pretty darn chuffed.
Stomp a landing: Landing nicely (instead of on you bum or face) after a trick has been performed in the air.
T**t gap: Some snowboarders make an effort at not making an effort with their appearance. At the other end of the spectrum are the boarders who get emotional if there is a space between the top of their new goggles and the rim of their helmet, otherwise known as a  ‘t**t gap’.
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